“Eyed” at the bank.

This I wrote yesterday while the Moon was in Pisces:

Suddenly came a feeling…I have to write. When was the last time I wrote here? About one year ago it looks like. Today the Moon is in Pisces. Might be because of that I’ve been sort of drifting around the whole day. I have no idea where this little text will go but that´s how it´s supposed to be a day like this.

When I woke up on this job free day the Sun was shining but when I was finally out of the house heading for the city center it was suddenly fog everywhere. It happens quite often in this city of canals but when it’s on a Pisces Moon day it gives a much more spiritual and mystical feeling. Actually I love fog, it’s much easier to pretend that you live in a fairy tale then, and I love fairy tales.

Now talking about Pisces I would like to share a thing that happened to me a few days ago. It started like this that I had to go to the bank to complete a random bank task. I really dislike visiting the bank. I simply don’t like the energy there and I also dislike everything that a bank stands for. But I am a human. A human that lives in a society…so I went.

I wanted to make the procedure as less painful and simple as possible, so I put on my stone face and went with steady steps towards the young man with the intense colgate smile sitting behind the desk.

A polite man. Smiling constantly…almost a little too constant. Asking me all kinds of questions that I had no idea about that bank people asked, but I’m new in this place and I want to be polite in the new culture that I’m adapting too so I smile back politely and answer the questions as short as I can. (To be a Gemini I can be quite introvert some days and not at all the typical social genius Gemini, I blame Virgo rising)

It is something with this man’s smile that is not fully correct. It’s not that I think about it at that moment but I start sweating, but I don’t realize what is wrong at that moment, but my body gives my some kind of strong signals that I ignore in my attempt to be polite. (What kind of sickness is that, to be polite into insanity?!) My boyfriend would have said for sure if he was watching that the guy was flirting with me, but my intuition speaks something else.

The man while finishing my banking request simultaneously continues to ask me questions that I am sure are not obligatory in the banking process! These are a few of them:

• What are you doing here?
• What is your boyfriend doing
• Where do you live?
• Why did you come here?
• How are you going to achieve this and that…?

Now after I am a little bit shocked that I didn’t react, said something. I see myself as a quite “reactive” person so to say. I am not lame at all, rather the opposite, but it was something about this whole situation that made me paralyzed and like those theater dolls that you pull in threads from above in order to make them move, and somebody was holding in my threads at this moment.

The eyes of that guy… yes the eyes, it is very important to mention that there was a desynchronisation of that guys eyes and smile.

That was it. My banking request was done and I went home. On the way home I feel upset somehow, but I cannot pin point out what it could be. By the time I am home I feel quite unbalanced and I break down and start crying. My boyfriend asks me what is going on and I tell him that I have no idea. My boyfriend (who has an incredible intuition) asks me what happened at the bank. I tell the story, and he says that he had a bad feeling about the bank already when I said I was going there. Then he says the one thing that makes even the most open minded girl in the world (me) skeptical.

– You got “eyed”!!!

Eh…ok. And what does that mean exactly? He explains that if a person look at you with some kind of bad thoughts and intentions this person can transfer “bad” energy to you, just by looking at you. My boyfriend is from South Europe and there this is widely known. I am from another place of earth but I also believe in energies although in my culture we never spoke about “eyeing” in this sense.

I cannot know exactly what happened but it was a one of a kind experience that’s for sure! That is not the way you´re supposed to feel after a bank meeting.  And it’s not like me at all to break down just because somebody looks strange at you.

I’ve been thinking a bit about this incident since then.  Many people have called me a “sensitive” person. This can mean so much, but I think that I do am extra sensitive to environments. This further made me think about Neptune and boundaries. People with strong emphasis on Pisces or Neptune in their birth chart are said to take extra care of them self when it comes to energy radiation. This is something that I’m still working on. I easily get “sucked” into situations and this can be both good and bad. On the positive side when I’m in an inspiring environment I can suck in this energy in a nanosecond and become completely ecstatic, but when I’m in a negative environment I can feel completely drained…also in a nanosecond. I have my natal Moon in the 12^th house trine Neptune.

Another thing that I thought about is what could be the evolutionary purpose of being hyper sensitive to environments. I believe that everything has a evolutionary purpose, that every person has a purpose in the collective. We all have specific “skills” that we are meant to use in bringing the collective further in development.

What could be the evolutionary advantages for our specie by having hyper sensitive personalities? What do you think?

 

A letter for a loved friend

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The twelfth house is the house of the vast oceans. In the oceans lies the hidden, it can´t be seen by the humans (unless you snorkel). Still people knows there are things there under. In the ocean you can also throw things that you don´t want to know about. But just because we can´t see it, does it mean it´s not there?
People with the Sun in the twelfth house can feel invisible at times, they can sometimes or often experience that they feel the feelings of the collective – of other people. The things that others throw away, because it´s heavy or discomforting those feelings end up in the 12th house. That’s why a 12th house Sun person can feel sometimes as if she or he is carrying the world on his shoulders.
We are all connected to each other. It´s not possible to make things disappear, it will always end up somewhere. And the things that humans want to get rid of – it ends up in the twelfth house. And as we humans are intimately connected to each other here on earth the 12th house Sun person can sometimes carry a load that’s been built up through generations on earth or their own family history through generations. Known also as – Karma.
Because 12th house sun people experience all those things that many ignores (often the darker sides of the humanity) and try to overlook they often have a lot of empathy and a deep understanding of others feelings, because they experience the feelings of the collective all the time!! They often have excellent healing skills if they make effort to develop it. Isn´t there a saying that goes:” only someone who´ve felt real pain have the real ability to heal others.”
The Sun represent a persons inner core and also true self expression in the birth horoscope, and when the sun resides in this 12th house the self expression can be somehow “burried” it lies somehow underneath. Once again, think about the oceans of earth and how it´s a mystery for us people. Its´ not so surprising then to understand that people with personal planets in this house ruled by Pisces are drawn to or skilled in areas of life that humanity try to suppress or ignore. We find those people often working in areas dealing with people living outside of society, sick and weak people, or people who´ve just not been accepted in society because of the standards we make up collectively. Mental institutions, prisons, elderly care, hospitals or institutions that take care of marginalized people. Just a few examples of many others…
They also often have psychic abilities and are able to “sense” things before others do.
Being a twelfth house sun is not bad in any way, they can become as successful as anybody else who make effort. The only difference is that they will probably find their true calling in those areas that society has tried to suppress for generations. Here they can become very skill full and appreciated.
Don´t forget that many famous people that has done some of the greatest things for humanity, has a 12th house Sun. You can find them in the history books.
What does this tell us then? Well…I think it tells us that everything is connected and that there is a higher plan in action for all of us. There is a plan for every single person, you choose yourself if you want to follow or rebel. Astrology always tells us secrets about where we can feel at home and a sense of belonging.
I added this video of Alicia Keys that reminds me of the 12th house. A girl that has a healing ability…notice also the water in the beginning and the end of the video…I wonder if Alicia has Astrology knowledge…:P Maybe.

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Incredible Tina Turner and the T- square

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I searched astro.com for famous people with the T- square in their chart. I found a lot of relics, and what I mean with that is a lot of old famous people that lived for a drillion years ago, and then I found…Tina Turner! Who hasn´t been affected by Tina Turner in one way or another!? So I choose her to look at her T- square that I wrote some about in the previous post. So you better read that one before you read this post :D
Tinas T-square happened to be very similar to mine! In the same signs and the same houses! Only that she has the focal planet (also called apex planet) in Pisces instead of Virgo like me.
A red triangle connecting Gemini, Sagittarius and Pisces
Can you see it? It´s very obvious.
If you don´t see it you might consider getting glasses :P
You can compare it with my chart in the previous post and you will see that they are very similar. You might think I´m very self centered now choosing a T- square similar to mine and with the incredible Tina Turner also, but she was the only interesting person I could find with a T-square that was not 300 years old and a bit forgotten :D Although the T- square is said to be found in at least 40 % of all natal charts. So it´s not exactly uncommon.
As an opposition always is included in a T-square this means that we have the usual power struggle between the two (or sometimes more) planets in the opposition. The focal planet is a dynamic principle that has trouble getting integrated into the awareness- process of the opposition without causing tensions, self blockage and imbalance within the individual. These tensions express themselves through the individuals relationships. The focal planet causes the opposed planets to get in conflict with each other instead of complementing each other like they should when they function optimal.
The sign and house position of the focal planet tells us where the tension is felt. As in Tinas case the seventh house and Pisces.
The first thing I come to think about in this moment of writing is that Tina got almost killed by her ex husband, that tortured her mentally and physically for many years. This got broadcasted all over the world so it´s a quite famous story.
And her focal planet is Mars in the seventh house of relationships. Any bells ringing?? It doesn´t need to have a connection, but it could.

The T- square is considered a dynamic aspect in the horoscope that forces the individual to take action and try to balance the tensions. It´s a psychological struggle that is considered a constructive force within the person.
It is said that people that have made an above average impact on the world often have this aspect pattern.
How the focal planet “acts” within this pattern depends a lot on how it is managed, as I said if it´s managed in a good way it can be a great driving force for the individual, but mismanaged it can intensify the negative matters of the opposition like for example lack of understanding of the rights and needs of others.
The house and sign where you find the focal planet indicates where you can find frustrations, habitual insecurities and defensive reactions.

So to keep it simple…it´s important to look at the focal planet and it´s position so that you can manage this planet in a good way. Look at the house and sign and see if it gives you any clues about your life (if it´s your own natal chart) and if you manage the planet in a good way or not.
When properly handled the focal planet can play a mediating role in keeping the opposing planet from becoming unresolved in their action.

I said I was going to write about the different nature of the mutable, fixed and cardinal T- square, but I think this is enough for this time. If you have basic knowledge of astrology you can probably figure out what the difference is.
But remember that a proper T- square is always made up by one opposition and two squares together.
And to say something about Tinas T- square…well we can guess that Mars is a energy that must be properly handled in her life, to not cause frustrations. And Mars in Pisces is already a bit challenging from the start.
I finish this post with saying that Tina is an incredibly woman! – A true force of nature that have had a brilliant career and survived a man that nearly killed her. She just has a Goddess aura surrounding her. A true inspiration for many woman in the world I think!!

Ps: Is it just an accident that Tina is famous for her great legs, or is it because she is Sagittarius? – Ruler of the legs :D

Mutable signs and the T- square

Drew Barrymore is born in the mutable sign of Pisces. Mutable signs can be very good actors/actresses because of their chameleon skills.

The last day of the Astrology course for this term we discussed important aspect patterns. We looked at our own horoscopes to investigate this. I discovered that I have a mutable T- square in my chart.
For those who don´t know, the zodiac signs are divided into three groups of different qualities.

Fixed – Taurus, Leo, Scorpio. Aquarius
Mutable – Gemini, Sagittarius, Pisces, Virgo
Kardinal – Cancer, Libra, Capricorn, Aries

If you take a look at my chart that I´ve added you can see the T- square as a red triangle between the Sun, Moon and Uranus. Or if you don´t know the planet symbols look at Gemini, Sagittarius and Virgo and you will see that a red triangle binds them together.
A T- square always consists of 3 or more planets creating one opposition and two squares all together. Quite easy to see if you look at it isn´t it?
A T- square always falls in signs of the same quality. As for me then- The mutable signs. And I have a feeling that my T- square is very strong because both the Sun and the Moon are participating in my T- square. The two most Influential planets in the personality.
And I know now after 31 years of living that the mutable energy is a very strong force in my life.
I also have both the ascendant, Mercury, and Neptune in those three mutable signs.
So what about mutable signs?
The mutable signs owns a great flexibility and also an urge to “move” either physically, mentally or emotionally. Or all three of them at the same time.
The word mutable comes from the Latin root “Mutabilis” that means change. You can say that the mutable signs have the change within them. They move easily and smooth through changes and are not the first ones striving against them when they come unpredictably. This is of course a very useful ability but the challenge for mutable signs can instead be to keep steady and rooted when this is needed, and to not escape too easily. The mutable signs are really the shape shifters of the Zodiac and this can sometimes express itself as a restlessness.
The mutable signs live in a changing world and with the change also coming from inside of them. This is a natural state for them.
Have you seen the children program called “Barbapapa”? One of my favourite shows when I was a kid. The Barbapapa family and their members have the ability to change into any object desirable. Say a chair or an airplane for example…Wonderful. The whole Barbafamily lives within the mutable energy :D
The Barbapapa was invented and written by two French authors.

My mutable life
In my life the mutable energy has expressed itself as a restlessness, definitely. Sometimes I see now that I´ve left situations and people maybe a bit too easy. Because I´ve had it so easy to just ride the change and trusting something better will come. But it´s not always that something better comes. Sometimes it just becomes an endless circle of starting over and over again. So that is something that I have to work on. But I think I´ve evolved a lot here only the last few years.
My strong side is that I have a tremendous ability to adapt fast to circumstances.
In the next post I will tell you what the T- square means, whether you may have it in fixed, mutable or cardinal signs. But not everybody have a T- square.
Ps. If you see any misspellings I´ll be very grateful if you tell me.

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My birthchart

The Barbafamily

The Ascendant – Which superpowers came with you earth costume?

The Ascendant (as I wrote about in the previous posts) turned out to be a hot potato. My fellow students and colleges all had something to say about it. Most of them could relate to what I said about the inherent conflict between the Sun and the Ascendant. But it was not only negative things! Of course not…differences and polarities create constructiveness. Without resistance maybe we would just fall asleep. Maybe it is a bit like the squares in the horoscope- the squares put us (hopefully) in to action!
Another brilliant Astrologer Wilhelm Axling explained the Ascendant in a hilarious way (I´ve added my own touch a little)

Something like this:

Imagine that you´re landing on earth , you are just a soul, so you need an “earth costume” to survive. This costume is picked from the wardrobe where you have your birth Ascendant. This costume has all the special tools and qualities that belongs to the sign witch your Ascendant is in. This special designed costume is specially made for your life path and what you have in front of you. Doesn´t it feel so much more positive when you think about it like this? :D You have the best toolbox you can have to get through this life with dignity!
And don´t come and say that the costume with corresponding toolbox doesn´t fit your intentions with life. You have no idea what life has in store for you…
A few examples that I´ve made up myself :

Leo Ascendant got the diva costume. It includes a glitter and glam function that blinds people to that degree that Leo meanwhile takes the chance to take over the world, or at least become the ruler of a small country.

Gemini Ascendant got the speed-of – light and chameleon costume. Gemini can get out of any tricky situation just by changing shape and colour, suddenly melting in to the wall when necessary or becoming a speed racing car (like Barbapapa) when there are no other options then to escape.

Virgo Ascendant of course got the nurse toolbox and costume. And also an analytic and discriminating eye that would make detective Poirot green with envy.

Pisces Ascendant got the smooth operator costume and with that comes the big bleeding sympathetic eyes – very dangerous, can uncover the deepest hidden secrets within anyone. And the worst thing is that it´s impossible to get angry with Pisces or put him or her against the wall. If the bleeding beautiful eyes is not enough weapon against charge Pisces may just dissolve into a drifting fog. Pisces toolbox has similarities with Geminis toolbox.

Thank you Wilhelm for inspiration!
Wilhelms homepage in Swedish http://www.himlaord.nu/